20th of April in the year of our lord 2013. It's been 3 weeks since that fateful day in the Middleton Arms when Lady Mortimer explained her crazy scheme to me. Why did I say yes? Maybe it was the passions of her plan, maybe because still Her Majesties Government seemed silent on the issue, maybe it was the ale. I think the truth is I'm an old fashioned romantic and the Pole truly is one of the great unsurpassed beauties in the world.
Our journey began well enough. Myself and my trusty companion had arrived on the express train in good time and met our companions near London Bridge. It was here that at this time I discovered the true insanity of Lady Mortimer's plan for she had seen fit to bring a bear. Truly this woman was crazy, to bring a full sized Arctic bear on such an already perilous adventure was beyond all reasoning.
As we arrived at the Golden Hinde my heart sunk as we saw she was run aground. Now we needed a new plan to cross the treacherous waters that lay between us and the Pole. Unperturbed our party set about setting up camp and building relations with the natives and the many foreign visitors to this area. I watched on with horror as many of the locals played with the bear. Some of the younger children showed a wisdom beyond their years in cowering away, but most stroked this beast as if it was but a pet cat.
As the day drew on we knew that we had to take leave of the amazing hospitality shown to us here. News had arrived of a group heading East who had divined a crossing we could use. We resolved to meet them there and forge the crossing together.
It was an arduous journey along the South bank. There was much encouragement from those we met. It was truly a noble group I was travelling with for despite the hardship and and setbacks spirits remained high.
As we approached the crossing our second bad omen. The other group had been forced to take another route, they could no longer join us at the crossing. We had to go on alone and time was now short. We forged that crossing alone and drove hard, although none of us spoke of it the renewed pace showed that all were concerned for the welfare of our fellow expedition.
At last after a final push we reached our destination. There ahead of me I could see the Pole. Truly it was a glorious sight but no more so than the faces of the other team arrived safe. We had finally made it and much celebration was due for a glorious epic. Still I wondered, bad omens can come in threes and as for where our third was lurking I thought I knew.
I still ponder over those final words Lady Mortimer said to me.
“Oh come on Matt it's only Dan in a costume. Why do you have to make such a drama about everything?
Now hurry up they are about to do the heart formation photos.”
Archivists Notes
For details of a genuinely arduous trek check out Team Aurora www.greenpeace.org/northpole
Oh and Nelson's Column is a kind of Pole. Sort of. ….ish!
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