Part of the Greenpeace Motor Show blog

Despite my fears of being blugeoned to death by furious Top Gear fans with the mocking, satanic laughter of JC (he's not the messiah...) ringing in my ears and various carbon oxides burning in my nostrils, it would appear that the motor show is survivable, with the correct guide. So, as a mark of my gratitude I've decided to let the remaining twenty six mistakes in their token 'green' page remain uncorrected.

I haven't checked whether it was another record breaker, but today was bloody hot. Feeling somewhat grubby when I arrived at the motor show, I decided to take a stroll over to the Galaxy First Class Lounge to pay a visit to my barber, Amir Dastgir.

Amir is a First Class barber, it's written all over his face in the shape of a beard designed by Euclid and laser sculpted by NASA. So precisely defined it's got a ten page entry in the OED, so sharp it cuts itself. I relax into the reclining chair, gazing up at the racing car nailed twenty feet up on the wall, and within minutes the only discernable difference between my head and a baby's bottom is a pair of eyebrows.